thanksgiving

Thanksgiving is amazing. When else do you ever roast a giant bird indigenous to our country, soak old bread in delicious sh*t and then rebake it, and black out on f*cking cranberries1 (Note: That dressing description was rather awful, but we all now how pivotal it is in the Thanksgiving experience)?! It’s America at its most traditional and delicious and thanks to recent advancements in people wanting to do this more than once a year, we’re now blessed with the miracle of Friendsgiving.

Although there are a number of amazing aspects of Friendsgiving, each of which I could wax on about to the point where I’ll need to leave my office, buy a turkey sandwich and a can of ocean spray cranberry jelly, and go straight to cookie monster-style devourage, I’ll instead let you insinuate my feelings from the following chart. Hope you’re psyched for the festivities!

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* I’ve actually had incredible food at most of the Friendsgivings I’ve attended, but a third party thought it would be funnier to use the 7Up focused photo for comedic contrast.